DAY 1 GOALS HAVE BEEN REVISED! (what do you guys think of the advanced, intermediate, and rookie levels? I know it kinda sounds like a video game, lol)
DAY 1
ADVANCED: Goal: Approach one attractive woman and have a short conversation about anything.
If you can't think of anything to say, talk about the weather, a recent news event, a sports game, anything! The conversation needn't be long. If you talk for less than a minute, then it's ok.
INTERMEDIATE: Goal: Offer two random women compliments.
You can offer a compliment on their style, their sunglasses, their hair, their good posture, their purse, basically anything!
EX: "Hi there, you look like you're having a great day, you have a nice smile!"
ROOKIE: Goal: Walk by three separate women, make eye contact, and smile.
Day 2
Goal: Approach one attractive woman, have a short conversation, and offer her a genuine compliment.
Compliment her if she's well spoken or sounds intelligent, or if she exhibits some other good quality.
Day 3
Goal: Approach two separate attractive women, and have a short conversation with both of them.
Day 4
Goal: Approach one attractive woman, and talk with her for at least 5 minutes.
Wear a watch if you need to time yourself. If you run out of things to say just stick with it and say whatever comes to kind.
Day 5
Goal: Approach one atractive woman, introduce yourself, shake hands, compliment her, and talk with her for at least 5 minutes.
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I got the idea for this challenge after finding this on another forum:
Quote:
Solution for ending social anxiety (yes, this does actually work):
1. Every time you pass someone on the street or in a store, say "hello", "how are you doing", "hows it going", etc. Make this a habit. You should do this to about 20-25 people every day. Just say "hello" and smile, that's all you have to do. After doing this for about a week or two move on to step two.
2. Every time you pass someone on the street or in a store, make eye contact, hold eye contact, and say hello. Again, make this a habit! Every person you pass you should always say hello to. And remember to maintain eye contact through the conversation. It's ok to look away occasionally but don't talk to the wall or the ceiling! Do this to about 20-25 people every day for a whole week. (that's 150+ people in one week!)
*Maintain eye contact and smile
3. After completing the first two steps in roughly 2 weeks time, you will now begin to approach people to make conversation. Every time you're near a stranger you will say hello, then you will make small talk. Talk about the weather, talk about sports, current news events, anything that comes to mind. Sometimes people will not respond because they may not be in the mood to talk, but that's ok. Always try to keep the conversation positive and upbeat. No one likes depressing or negative conversations. Make small talk with at least 10 strangers per day, while also saying hello to EVERY person you pass on the street, in stores, at your workplace, etc. Remember to maintain eye contact! Do this for a whole week. (that's 70 people to make small talk with in one week)
4. For week 4 you will repeat step 3, except this time you will give a compliment to every stranger you make small talk with. The compliment must not be some generic compliment (like you're beautiful, you have pretty eyes, etc.). If the stranger seems well educated on a subject, then you can compliment them on that. If the stranger radiates positive energy, then you can give them a compliment on that. (That's 70 people to give compliments to in one whole week - 10 per day)
5. For week 5 you will begin to engage in deeper conversation. Throughout this entire process you should continuously be saying "hi" to every person you pass by on the street or in buildings and also engaging in small talk when time permits. For this week you will approach 70 strangers (or brief acquaintances) and make small talk. While engaging in small talk, you will try to make a deeper connection with that person by trying to understand them on a personal level. To understand a person, one thing we don't want to do is to ask a set series of generic questions. This would come off as an interrogation, not a nice conversation. So instead we can ask questions that sound like statements.
Let's say you're talking to a guy that kinda looks like a surfer and you want to figure out where he's from. You can say, "So you're a Californian, right? I'm getting kind of a surfer vibe from you." He'll respond and say yes or no and then he'll tell you where he's from. The difference here is that you didn't ask a generic question, "So where are you from?" Instead you made a statement/assumption about the person that allowed the conversation to flow more smoothly, while also attaining information that you desired. Making friendly statements/assumptions about people shows that you're actually paying attention to them.
Here's another example:
-Generic question: "How old are you?"
-Friendly statement: "You seem wise beyond your years, I know you can't be older than me, I'm only 37 but you look a lot younger!"
Try to refrain from overusing generic questions.
Police officers and CIA interrogators ask generic questions, and you don't want to come off like they do.
You can take two weeks for this step if necessary. The more practice the better. Over time you will become a natural conversationalist.
(Approach 70 strangers over a weeks time and connect with them by asking questions that are disguised as statements, assumptions, or compliments)
http://lunaticoutpost.com/Topic-Social- ... ks?page=10