Ridiculously generalised impressions of the USA

Malady · **Posted:** 29 May 2011, 22:21

Of course my comment was tongue-in-cheek. But if you really wanted, you could easily travel for free just because of your gender.

Many women are hypergamous, so not travelling is just a sign of my indigence, low status and inexperience. It's a turn-off for most women.

Dsea · **Posted:** 29 May 2011, 22:25

I don't know where is it like where you come from but none of my female friends ever travelled for free just cause they are women. And you don't know me or know what I look like, if I'm 22 and hanging on that board it's surely not cause I could trap a guy into buying me some plane tickets.

fschmidt · **Posted:** 29 May 2011, 22:26

thechak wrote:

On obesity, I think it depends a lot on region too:

http://www.usnews.com/opinion/articles/ ... s-by-state

I just want to point out that anything based on BMI (body mass index) is worthless. This measures weight to height and labels body builders as obese.

Malady · **Posted:** 29 May 2011, 22:35

@Dsea - I've seen such situations. I know many men who are such sycophants that they can do anything for any woman, no matter what she looks like. I used to be blind to it but I realised that female looks don't matter much to a lot of men. Of course women's shyness, phobias and mental problems are totally irrelevant to them.

Small Pink Blob · **Posted:** 29 May 2011, 22:56

Malady wrote:

Many women are hypergamous, so not travelling is just a sign of my indigence, low status and inexperience. It's a turn-off for most women.

Not to support hypergamy, but I agree that having traveled can make you more attractive in the average woman's eyes (it's also a plus with people in general). It means you're not boring and you have stories to tell. Some women will also interpret it as a code word for being rich, but there are many who just think traveling is a fun subject.

I'm not saying traveling alone is the cure to incel or anything. Just that it's a nice conversational bonus.

Malady · **Posted:** 29 May 2011, 23:04

That's why I've almost given up. I just can't stand the way the things are. I'm aware of my worthlessness in most women's eyes.

I'm too different from most people. I don't need travelling or having a car at all, I'd rather straighten my teeth, buy a new computer or even some gym equipment. I'm just inferior.

Zeek · **Posted:** 30 May 2011, 16:14

Malady wrote:

But if you really wanted, you could easily travel for free just because of your gender.

I'm sure you could...in very certain circumstances. I cannot see a man buying a girl a plane ticket to Poland or elsewhere if she asks him/flirts with him/etc. There would surely have to be some contextual motivation there - the only situations I can think of are a) they are a couple, and he gifts her the ticket, or they are family and he helps her out with the ticket b) he loans her money as a friend, c) she is a mistress or a high-end escort that he is paying to fly somewhere.

It's hardly a bus ticket...for something as big and as expensive as a plane ticket, either she would be very close to him, or there would be another motivation there and an expected payment for him as well. I just can't see a girl flirting with some guy in a bar or elsewhere and her wrangling a plane ticket out of the deal, in most situations (obviously, there are probably exceptions). I would compare it to an expensive piece of jewellery. A man may buy a woman an expensive piece of jewellery if a) they are married / a couple b) she is a sister / close family member c) he expects something out of the deal (e.g., it is for a mistress) or d) he is completely, completely infatuated with her. All of those situations happen - but not in everyday casual interactions between a man and a woman...

[Man: *drops some icecubes on the floor next to cute girl in a bar* "Well, now I've broken the ice...it's your turn!"
Girl: *giggles, smiles coyly* "That's very cute...if a bit corny..." *plays with hair*

*twenty minutes of flirting and chatting*

Girl: "Say, you're really sweet. Could you buy me a no strings attached plane ticket to Krakow? Maybe even America?" *looks really cute*
Guy: "Um...you are kidding, right?" ]

Zeek · **Posted:** 30 May 2011, 16:21

Malady wrote:

That's why I've almost given up. I just can't stand the way the things are. I'm aware of my worthlessness in most women's eyes.

I'm too different from most people. I don't need travelling or having a car at all, I'd rather straighten my teeth, buy a new computer or even some gym equipment. I'm just inferior.

I really don't think an interest in those things makes you 'inferior'. I'm going to put in a vote for the new computer though.

eruditebeholder · **Posted:** 30 May 2011, 17:45

Zeek wrote:

Malady wrote:

But if you really wanted, you could easily travel for free just because of your gender.

I'm sure you could...in very certain circumstances. I cannot see a man buying a girl a plane ticket to Poland or elsewhere if she asks him/flirts with him/etc. There would surely have to be some contextual motivation there - the only situations I can think of are a) they are a couple, and he gifts her the ticket, or they are family and he helps her out with the ticket b) he loans her money as a friend, c) she is a mistress or a high-end escort that he is paying to fly somewhere.

It's hardly a bus ticket...for something as big and as expensive as a plane ticket, either she would be very close to him, or there would be another motivation there and an expected payment for him as well. I just can't see a girl flirting with some guy in a bar or elsewhere and her wrangling a plane ticket out of the deal, in most situations (obviously, there are probably exceptions). I would compare it to an expensive piece of jewellery. A man may buy a woman an expensive piece of jewellery if a) they are married / a couple b) she is a sister / close family member c) he expects something out of the deal (e.g., it is for a mistress) or d) he is completely, completely infatuated with her. All of those situations happen - but not in everyday casual interactions between a man and a woman...

[Man: *drops some icecubes on the floor next to cute girl in a bar* "Well, now I've broken the ice...it's your turn!"
Girl: *giggles, smiles coyly* "That's very cute...if a bit corny..." *plays with hair*

*twenty minutes of flirting and chatting*

Girl: "Say, you're really sweet. Could you buy me a no strings attached plane ticket to Krakow? Maybe even America?" *looks really cute*
Guy: "Um...you are kidding, right?" ]

In the US, it does happen in "everyday casual interactions between a man and a woman" - you have no idea how desperate a huge portion of US guys is.

Malady · **Posted:** 30 May 2011, 19:50

Zeek wrote:

Malady wrote:

But if you really wanted, you could easily travel for free just because of your gender.

I'm sure you could...in very certain circumstances. I cannot see a man buying a girl a plane ticket to Poland or elsewhere if she asks him/flirts with him/etc. There would surely have to be some contextual motivation there - the only situations I can think of are a) they are a couple, and he gifts her the ticket, or they are family and he helps her out with the ticket b) he loans her money as a friend, c) she is a mistress or a high-end escort that he is paying to fly somewhere.

It's hardly a bus ticket...for something as big and as expensive as a plane ticket, either she would be very close to him, or there would be another motivation there and an expected payment for him as well. I just can't see a girl flirting with some guy in a bar or elsewhere and her wrangling a plane ticket out of the deal, in most situations (obviously, there are probably exceptions). I would compare it to an expensive piece of jewellery. A man may buy a woman an expensive piece of jewellery if a) they are married / a couple b) she is a sister / close family member c) he expects something out of the deal (e.g., it is for a mistress) or d) he is completely, completely infatuated with her. All of those situations happen - but not in everyday casual interactions between a man and a woman...

[Man: *drops some icecubes on the floor next to cute girl in a bar* "Well, now I've broken the ice...it's your turn!"
Girl: *giggles, smiles coyly* "That's very cute...if a bit corny..." *plays with hair*

*twenty minutes of flirting and chatting*

Girl: "Say, you're really sweet. Could you buy me a no strings attached plane ticket to Krakow? Maybe even America?" *looks really cute*
Guy: "Um...you are kidding, right?" ]

It's no use denying... females have everything easier in life. It's no surprise that the female posters are more or less biased (I fully understand, it's natural) but that's the truth.

Maybe it was a slight exaggeration, but such situations do happen. Maybe they aren't that frequent but there are rich men who can easily buy a plane ticket for random women. Anyway, many men buy bus or train tickets for women every single day, a lot of women are driven wherever they want by complete strangers every single day.

I'd give ANYTHING to be born a woman. You women can be shy and passive, have mental issues, and it's completely understood and accepted. Even a lot of people are willing to take care of you, whereas very few men have such privilege. Such a man is very likely to be labelled as a "loser", while the word doesn't even apply to women at all (or very, very rarely).

Sorry for derailing the thread but I'm just ranting...

Dsea · **Posted:** 30 May 2011, 20:17

"Slight exaggeration"... I never saw anything of the sort, nor guys paying for random women or giving them bus tickets or anything, let alone buying them a plane ticket. It's different if it's a couple who go abroad but otherwise, for me it's just unrealistic at best. I won't take for granted something I never saw nor experienced.

Tich · **Posted:** 30 May 2011, 23:00

I've heard of men paying for women's plane tickets when they've known each other online and are meeting in person for the first time. Overall, though, I don't think many men would pay for a random woman's plane ticket.

Personally, I would pay for a woman I know to accompany me on a trip if I thought there was a possibility of romance, but would never do the same for a random one. Then again, I've helped pay for male friends' tickets (never in full) as well, so I guess it wouldn't be too out of the ordinary from my normal travel MO. I like traveling with someone I know, so I'm usually willing to help facilitate them coming along if they so desire.

eruditebeholder · **Posted:** 31 May 2011, 00:38

Dsea wrote:

"Slight exaggeration"... I never saw anything of the sort, nor guys paying for random women or giving them bus tickets or anything, let alone buying them a plane ticket. It's different if it's a couple who go abroad but otherwise, for me it's just unrealistic at best. I won't take for granted something I never saw nor experienced.

Again, this is definitely something that happens in North America on a regular basis - in fact, plane tickets are chump change compared to what guys buy random women on a regular basis.

Once again, you don't get how desperate many guys are here - and to what lengths they are willing to go.

foxyproxy · **Posted:** 31 May 2011, 00:41

I haven't quite got to the States yet, I do genunially want to go at some point but the plan for the imminent future is Brazil, China and maybe Russia and India, having received offers from respective friends of mine to visit all said countries.

Truth be told, the company with whom I've got a job in September has their headquarters in Boston and also a big base in San Jóse, so I would be hopeful of a potential transfer there depending on how things go.

One thing I've found about all the American people I've met over the years while travelling or through college is that they light up to me and are always a lot more interested once they find out that I'm Irish. I'm not sure whether the same would be true in the US itself, but it's an encouraging start.

Strange that Cork and Edinburgh have creeped into this thread, I've lived in the former for 4 years, and currently live in the latter. Cork I quite liked and enjoyed, and probably would be my 1st choice of abode in Ireland. Edinburgh is a great place with lovely people, and I could indeed see myself living there long term, however it's a shame Scotland's economy has such a high percentage tied up in the Public Sector. Leaves little enough hope for those such as myself. :lol:

oncebitten55 · **Posted:** 31 May 2011, 02:04

Zeek wrote:

Quote:

People tend to have an attitude of openness and being unreserved about what they say - while this could potentially spill into being a socially bad thing (i.e., being outspoken, or impolite) - it was actually very humbling to see it in practice - a general attitude of helpfulness, openness and goodwill. The UK could learn a thing or too about it with our general attitude of being insular, cool and reserved towards strangers or newcomers..

Many people here do love to help out people, since we have no real social programs that are easily available for everyone, like Europe does. Charity isnt what it once was, when I was young but many people here still donate time and money. You
were in NYC, then you may or may not have noticed that we have millions of homeless people who would starve to death if not for the charity here.

America never was the land of opportunity, that many people claim it was, but in years past many people did come here and start thier own businesses, as my grandparents did, but that was long ago and times have changed for the worse, for small business owners. Regulations and taxes are a major issue now, that they were not prior to the 1960's in the USA.

Also, if you have a European accent, you will definately go much further here, as Americans really love people with accents of English, French, Italian, Aussie or Irish origins.

Quote:

- The tea is horrible. HORRIBLE. I found myself suffering major Earl Grey withdrawal symtoms to the point of having dreams about tea.

LOL!!! We dont drink tea, we drink coffee here. Starbucks and other coffee shops are still booming here in this recession.

Quote:

- Books - for some reason people on subways, buses, etc, tended to have electronic devices, like a Kindle, rather than a book. It struck me as a little strange.

Many Americans are illiterate or semi-illiterate, but thats just a little talked about fact in the US. Many can read, but never learned what "10 dollar" words mean, so you have to speak to many people using simpler English, in many locations, particularly in the deep South where ignorance and racism rules the day, long after the Civil War of 1861-65 is over with.

Quote:

- Public technology (in major cities anyway) is notably quite advanced - e.g. public electronic devices, automated hygiene machines seemingly everywhere, etc, which is a difference from the UK and most European countries - I'm not saying that our countries are backwards in a technological sense, just that the technology for public use doesn't tend to be quite as shiny as it is in the US.

Depends on where you are at in the US, I suppose. I didnt know we were ahead of Europe in that technology. Since 9/11 and the other terrorist attacks, people here have become more vigilant about avoiding germs, so automatic water, soap and paper towel dispensers in public places are quite common these days, even in most fast food outlets.

Quote:

- Obesity - it's a stereotype, I know, and I'm a little unhealthily attuned to issues regarding weight, but still. I was quite shocked - even coming from a country with the highest obesity rate in Europe. For me it is unusual to see somebody who I would consider severely obese in an everyday sense, but in the US, seeing such people was quite commonplace. The standard for a 'normal' weight I think is significantly higher, for both men and women. I'd say that the average clothing size for women in the US is about 14/16 (Uk clothing size), with examples of what I would consider obesity (clothing size 22-24 and plus) being quite common. For comparison, the average clothing size for women in the UK is probably about 12/14, and in general on the continent the average size for women is probably about 10/12. The 'grab and go' food culture can't help - there's delicious, cheap take-out food everywhere you go, but most of it seemed quite - even lavishly - unhealthy, with lots of "add-ons" like cheese, salt, sauces, etc as standard. There's certainly less emphasis on healthy food - and availability of it as a take-out option.

Yeap. America is the land of lard@$$es, bar none. Even the kids under 12 are fat here. When I was a lad it wasn't that way, however.

McDonalds and all the other fat food eateries, sell foods LOADED with sugar or high fructose corn-syrup, including the burger buns, the burger and the french fries. Since America has lots of cars, most people can never burn off all the calories they consume, unless they work out. Sidewalks here can be very dangerous, so many people dont use them too much.

Quote:

- you really do need a car.

Yes, barring major cities, you do need a car or motorbike in the US unless you like waiting ages to get anywhere.

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