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Unreal
http://www.love-shy.com/lsbb/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=2188
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Author:  ieatboogers [ 11 Dec 2008, 21:58 ]
Post subject:  Unreal

In another thread, ieatboogers wrote:
....Another chat in late January led to one date with a different woman, one in which I had, in what was a first for me, deliberately worked toward and asked for, as opposed to having it happen by accident as another almost five years earlier had done. It didn't work out; she seemed even more nervous than I was (hard to imagine!) and after we had a pizza she said she wasn't interested in pursuing it further, so I drove her home and that was that....

I heard from her again while I was playing with the computer the other day. Some time between then and now, she changed her mind and wants to try again. I told her about the woman I'd started seeing in early May, and she came right out and asked me to stop seeing that one and start seeing her as boy friend-girl friend instead.
Of course, I had to turn her down. Even though the other woman is technically not my girl friend, she was still asking me to trade the known for the almost unknown, and what assurance would I have that it work out any better the second time around? If I do anything to upset the status quo, I might find myself in the same situation that I recently escaped from. I told her this (except the part about upsetting the status quo, which I kept to myself.) and she got all sad on me.
What did I ever do to deserve this? :(
What would you have done in my place?

Author:  Cold Heart [ 12 Dec 2008, 21:00 ]
Post subject: 

If I read this correctly, I believe you did the right thing. Once a girl I like or have interest in turns me down, there is no going back. You moved on and I commend you for that. Besides at worst it could have been a trap anyway. I haven't had this happen to me but if the girl I was infatuated with in high school were to "change her mind" about me now after 5 years, I would tell her "you had your chance... no... chances!" She continues getting on my nerves after that, then I would tell her to fuck off and go to Hell and just split. No need for further drama! If the girl from college who rejected me were to change her mind about me, tough shit! I'm not gonna fall for any damn traps. I ain't no fool! :twisted:

Author:  IceCat7 [ 19 Feb 2015, 02:53 ]
Post subject:  Re: Unreal

waitaminit, I know this is 7 years later but

which girl did you actually like better?? I presume you must have liked your current gf very much so to turn this offer down (as it was basically a gf handed to you on a plate - a dream proposition for the average ls).

For me, unless it was clear that I preferred one over the other, I would have met this woman a second time.

You said in other thread you regret not meeting up again - interesting!

Author:  ieatboogers [ 19 Feb 2015, 06:49 ]
Post subject:  Re: Unreal

Congrats, you hold the trophy for thread bumping :)
IceCat7 wrote:
waitaminit, I know this is 7 years later but

which girl did you actually like better?? I presume you must have liked your current gf very much so to turn this offer down (as it was basically a gf handed to you on a plate - a dream proposition for the average ls).

For me, unless it was clear that I preferred one over the other, I would have met this woman a second time.

You said in other thread you regret not meeting up again - interesting!
I didn't say I regretted turning her down, I said I turned her down with regret. I thought it was the right thing to do, but I still felt bad doing it.

Which one did I like better? I find that difficult to answer since I never really got to know the one that well. I probably would have tried her again if she had asked earlier, before I had found anyone else. It's anyone's guess how life would have unfolded if I had.

I still have the other one, so I can't complain.

Author:  Someone [ 19 Feb 2015, 22:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: Unreal

ieatboogers wrote:
I still have the other one, so I can't complain.


But that proves very clearly that it was the right choice. I mean you obviously live in a relationship for a couple of years now as far as I understand your post.

When I read your story, especially the part about her calling you back the other day, all my alert lights went on. Ok, she was nervous, probably because of shyness, but still, it was probable the she might have just late you down later to date a guy without loveshyness- or incel-issues or for whatever her taste in men is.

You've been careful and you've probably avoided a whole lot of trouble that way.

Author:  ieatboogers [ 20 Feb 2015, 10:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Unreal

Someone wrote:
But that proves very clearly that it was the right choice. I mean you obviously live in a relationship for a couple of years now as far as I understand your post.
About 6 years now. I must have done something right!

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