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PostPosted: 20 May 2017, 19:13 
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For the first time since ever all of my friends are in a relationship and therefore I am out of the invitations for their Summer holidays. A lot of people have told me that going alone on holiday could help (including my psychotherapist) to meet people. However, I remember from Dr. Gilmartin's video (unfortunately removed from Youtube) that incels on holiday in beach resorts are there in body but not in spirit.

What do you guys think? Can a holiday alone increase the self-esteem or, on the other hand, bring it down?


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PostPosted: 21 May 2017, 23:34 
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I would not recommend a holiday where you plan to just sit around on the beach or try to "meet people" which is usually a failure.

You should plan something that involves an activity that you enjoy, and is relatively appealing for you. For example, hiking trails, or riding a bicycle in a resort area can be enjoyable. Once I spent a week hiking the trails near Lake Como in Italian Switzerland, mostly by myself, although I met a few other young people, who were just visiting the area. I felt very out-of-place among the natives, especially since I spoke only a little Italian, just enough to order food in a restaurant and buy a few small items in shops, but I enjoyed the mountain hikes.

You could also go somewhere and take a class, not intellectual oriented, but maybe sports, music, or art, something where you are occupied each day for a few hours, but not too rigorous, so that you can balance the activity with free time. Although I am a poor musician, I went to music camp a few times in the summer and enjoyed it, since they had classes at all levels, and I could get together with other beginners like myself.


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