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Sweetness helps
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Author:  StromaeMeetsTomServo [ 04 Dec 2017, 21:25 ]
Post subject:  Sweetness helps

Especially if you're a guy, because there is a shortage of "sweet" men. I act sweet all the time and girls sometimes act interested in me. I know correlation doesn't always mean causation, but when you combine their reactions to me with my other sexy traits (not many), I figured that was probably the reason. Well, to be fair, I don't have a girlfriend but that's because there is no one at my school that I really love - a bunch that I can imagine dating, but no one stands out.

Author:  NoRomeoNoJuliet [ 04 Dec 2017, 23:23 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness help

In before you get a lot of hate and something along the lines of “girls are shallow bitches. If you’re not rich and/or handsome, you can be as kind as you want - they won’t be interested.” I kind of agree with you. It’s nice to be around positive (meaning, not full of vile) people who treat you like human beings and who themselves are decent human beings. Just don’t take it overboard and be a spineless kissass.

Author:  cerebral_barrier [ 05 Dec 2017, 03:10 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

Not to let the air out of your tires but I don't see this as an effective means of attracting women.

I'm intelligent, financially successful, very generous and tend to be well liked wherever I go. I also have a tendency (despite my better judgement) to help people in need. These things have literally NEVER gotten me any romantic interest from women. On the other hand, it has attracted a lot of needy overly dependent people who are unable and/or unwilling to reciprocate my generosity.

Women of my race(s) typically see(s) 'sweet' men as weaklings and like to 'test' them; leading to confrontations that can easily spiral out of control. Everyone else is stuck on the race issue itself; saying "it's just a preference" and no amount of 'sweetness' will change their mind.

Author:  StromaeMeetsTomServo [ 05 Dec 2017, 21:39 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

cerebral_barrier wrote:
Not to let the air out of your tires but I don't see this as an effective means of attracting women.

I'm intelligent, financially successful, very generous and tend to be well liked wherever I go. I also have a tendency (despite my better judgement) to help people in need. These things have literally NEVER gotten me any romantic interest from women. On the other hand, it has attracted a lot of needy overly dependent people who are unable and/or unwilling to reciprocate my generosity.

Women of my race(s) typically see(s) 'sweet' men as weaklings and like to 'test' them; leading to confrontations that can easily spiral out of control. Everyone else is stuck on the race issue itself; saying "it's just a preference" and no amount of 'sweetness' will change their mind.


You know what, I guess it's possible that the girls just want to be friends with me. I mean, in terms of looks, I have a pretty awful body, my only body parts that are semi-decent are maybe my face and hair.

Author:  cerebral_barrier [ 05 Dec 2017, 23:45 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

StromaeMeetsTomServo wrote:
cerebral_barrier wrote:
Not to let the air out of your tires but I don't see this as an effective means of attracting women.

I'm intelligent, financially successful, very generous and tend to be well liked wherever I go. I also have a tendency (despite my better judgement) to help people in need. These things have literally NEVER gotten me any romantic interest from women. On the other hand, it has attracted a lot of needy overly dependent people who are unable and/or unwilling to reciprocate my generosity.

Women of my race(s) typically see(s) 'sweet' men as weaklings and like to 'test' them; leading to confrontations that can easily spiral out of control. Everyone else is stuck on the race issue itself; saying "it's just a preference" and no amount of 'sweetness' will change their mind.


You know what, I guess it's possible that the girls just want to be friends with me. I mean, in terms of looks, I have a pretty awful body, my only body parts that are semi-decent are maybe my face and hair.

Dude, the friend-zone sucks... No matter what fairy tale crap people try to throw at you, don't ever make the mistake of being "friends" with a woman you're attracted to. She will exploit your generosity and you will never get what you (really) want out of the deal. The experience would be even worse than if you'd never met any woman at all.

Author:  StromaeMeetsTomServo [ 06 Dec 2017, 00:23 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

cerebral_barrier wrote:
Dude, the friend-zone sucks... No matter what fairy tale crap people try to throw at you, don't ever make the mistake of being "friends" with a woman you're attracted to. She will exploit your generosity and you will never get what you (really) want out of the deal. The experience would be even worse than if you'd never met any woman at all.


I'm not trying to make friends with women before they're dating them. I'm just saying that most girls probably only want me as friends, not as partners like I previously thought.

Author:  cerebral_barrier [ 06 Dec 2017, 22:13 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

StromaeMeetsTomServo wrote:
cerebral_barrier wrote:
Dude, the friend-zone sucks... No matter what fairy tale crap people try to throw at you, don't ever make the mistake of being "friends" with a woman you're attracted to. She will exploit your generosity and you will never get what you (really) want out of the deal. The experience would be even worse than if you'd never met any woman at all.


I'm not trying to make friends with women before they're dating them. I'm just saying that most girls probably only want me as friends, not as partners like I previously thought.

I do understand your intentions. I was just warning you to keep aware of the fact that some women (many, actually) may try to become your friend; expecting all the benefits of an actual relationship (you doing them favors, paying for stuff etc.) without offering anything substantial in return.

The friend-zone is just the most widely recognized scenario since men typically don't seek out female 'friends' due to other men being beter candidates for true friendship. Women on the other hand, are conditioned to exploit male utility value and will sometimes try to befriend you; not because they enjoy your company or share interests with you but for what you could potentially do for them.

I know not all women are like this but most are. While I won't try to dissuade you from having female friends, my experience is that women (regardless of your relationship type) tend to take men for granted; as is encouraged by today's society. Do what you feel is right (for you) but always watch your back.

Author:  StromaeMeetsTomServo [ 07 Dec 2017, 00:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

cerebral_barrier wrote:

I do understand your intentions. I was just warning you to keep aware of the fact that some women (many, actually) may try to become your friend; expecting all the benefits of an actual relationship (you doing them favors, paying for stuff etc.) without offering anything substantial in return.

The friend-zone is just the most widely recognized scenario since men typically don't seek out female 'friends' due to other men being beter candidates for true friendship. Women on the other hand, are conditioned to exploit male utility value and will sometimes try to befriend you; not because they enjoy your company or share interests with you but for what you could potentially do for them.

I know not all women are like this but most are. While I won't try to dissuade you from having female friends, my experience is that women (regardless of your relationship type) tend to take men for granted; as is encouraged by today's society. Do what you feel is right (for you) but always watch your back.


What if they are around my age? (18) I'm not sure if it is as common in my situation.

Author:  cerebral_barrier [ 08 Dec 2017, 00:36 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

Throughout my life, there has been a recurring theme; that any time a male and female try to become friends, one or both of two things happens.

- one of them (usually the guy) wants more than just friendship. I've had it happen both ways.

- the female will attempt to leverage her femininity to get special treatment at some point. (Female relatives are not excluded from this.)

This has been the case with almost every woman I've ever been close to.

Edit: Since it's been over 20 years since I was 18, take what I say with a grain of salt. However, this pattern has been repeating from when I was 18 into my current life.

Author:  Beocca [ 09 Dec 2017, 10:03 ]
Post subject:  Re: Sweetness helps

Being 'nice' may help. But it won't get you anywhere on it's own, except possibly the friend zone. This is assuming you don't get labeled as a 'nice guy'.

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