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Love-shy.com: Support for the dating-challenged - forum :: View topic - How I do online dating
Love-shy.com: Support for the dating-challenged - forum
http://www.love-shy.com/lsbb/

How I do online dating
http://www.love-shy.com/lsbb/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=9927
Page 4 of 11

Author:  jimmusician [ 12 Feb 2011, 18:39 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  NikkuMimura [ 12 Feb 2011, 18:56 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  jimmusician [ 12 Feb 2011, 19:34 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  Fonduman [ 18 Feb 2011, 00:15 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  jimmusician [ 18 Feb 2011, 02:57 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  CAPSLOCK [ 19 Feb 2011, 22:06 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating

Barely dare to admit it here, but: CAPSLOCK is feeling happy. CAPSLOCK has had a date today that was both fun and a success. Now CAPSLOCK feels entitled to write some tips too. CAPSLOCK don't care what you do with those tips, just hopes that they might be of any use to anyone.

DISCLAIMER: CAPSLOCK is NOT writing this piece of crap to make you go crazy because someone else seems to be succeeding. The only reason I am writing this, is because I sincerely hope it might be of help. Please.. allow some room for the thought that YOU might be able to pull it off.

1. The golden rule in love.
The golden rule in love is: there is no golden rule. What works in one case, miserably fails in another case and vice versa. No doubt, this is precisely the reason why love is such a difficult beast for Aspergers (like me). You cannot pin it down on a set of rules.

2. Goal: getting responses.
Contrary to the OP, I do not believe your goal should be to get as many responses as you can get. You want to get that 1 response you are hoping for. CAPSLOCK received only two responses in four months time.. but the second felt like hitting the jackpot.

3. Picture.
Yes, you must have a picture. Choose an INTERESTING picture. A picture that makes you stand out from the crowd. Interesting does not equals naked torso. Interesting equals you doing something interesting.

4. Profile.
OP says don't be controversial. CAPSLOCK says be as controversial as you are. Your goal is NOT to attract as many girls as you can. Your goal is to catch the attention of that one girl that matches you. So what do you do? Here is a genius idea: tell something about yourself. Something typically you. There is something special about you. Explain what it is.

5. When To Ask Her Out.
Just don't wait too long. In the end, you are not interested in internet conversations, but in real life action. So is she.

Author:  loveablenerd [ 19 Feb 2011, 22:19 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  Rossini [ 20 Feb 2011, 05:38 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating

I have to disagree with attracting a girl that matches you. Because a lot of times the girls in the profile are nothing like the girls in real life, so take it with a grain of salt. Lets face it, there aren't a lot of girls out there that match up good with us realistically. So you want to limit yourself to a small fraction of the girls that are on there? Its a numbers game, I used to do the same thing and never got dates cause I was limiting myself too much. Some girls turned out better than expected...others worse.

Also you are limiting on girls anyway depending on your standards. For instance you may automatically role out:
-single moms
-fat girls
-ugly girls

That is a good 70% right there. Then you have to rule out girls that don't match you? That is probably another 20%. If you ruled out 90% of women at least in my area, you would literally be left with about 10 girls. What if those 10 girls don't respond?

See what I mean.

Author:  CAPSLOCK [ 21 Feb 2011, 16:33 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  Tex [ 21 Feb 2011, 23:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating

This is good shit, Rossini. No fucking bullshit. Seriously dude, you've got to get a better haircut. Shave your head. You look socially awkward in that pic (and I've seen it before), and I think you have the potential to take your douche up a few notches.

Author:  justanother [ 26 Feb 2011, 19:10 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating

I was able to have an online talk with some of the best looking women (who also seem to be not stupid) in a dating site, even without a picture of me. But they were not a good match for me, neither me for them :) .

Author:  Rossini [ 26 Feb 2011, 23:52 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


Author:  Fairly shy [ 05 Mar 2011, 23:51 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating

Maybe you guys are starting to get the right idea! Yes, online dating is rough, but yes, eventually it works!

As Rossini says, you have to be pretty serious about it send messages to lots of women and not get downhearted when things go wrong - or at least not so downhearted that you give up!

Also remember that,

1) If you are seriously LS, you probably need to go on a few dates just to get used to the experience. The first few will feel awful, but knock off some of your rough edges. Remember, this is all about body language and behaviour, hardly at all about appearance!

2) It is fine to fantasise about James Bond's girls (or even Dr. Who's) but faced with a real girl that looks like she needed to use a dating site, don't react too fast, let her work on you! The chances are, she will look nicer as the evening wears on - particularly if you drink some wine - and just about any girl is better than none when you pass 20!

3) I decided that a useful strategy was to message the girls that didn't include a photo, because they would get less responses. Maybe they would be less attractive, but maybe they just wanted to keep their dating activities secret!

4) Don't try to rush your girl into sex. Even if she says yes, neither of you may be ready, and it will just go pear shaped!

5) If you are chatting with girls online, and even meeting the odd one, if you are not too fussy, the odds are very high that you too will have a girlfriend before too long. A lot of being LS, is that you end up with very little contact with girls/women, and it is easy to assume that they all have boyfriends anyway!

FS

Author:  ukshygirl [ 06 Mar 2011, 00:03 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating

.

Author:  CAPSLOCK [ 06 Mar 2011, 11:47 ]
Post subject:  Re: How I do online dating


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