So yeah, I'm getting fed up with being cooped up in my apartment with nothing to do. I joined two new Meetup groups: a "Peninsula Fast & Steep Hikers with Optional Running" group and a "New Young Professional Happy Hour Singles and Friends" one.

No, I'm not thrilled about going to these things and not knowing anyone. Yes, I have social anxiety.

Congrats! Taking the initiative to put yourself out of your comfort zone seems like a pretty big step, or at least it reflects a mindset of someone who's well ready to get over some issues. So go, have fun, and keep that mindset. You've done this much. Don't let yourself screw it up now.

I actually went to a meetup group for the first time today (well first time at this meetup, I've gone to a couple other groups in the past, but it was a while ago). I was so anxious that I couldn't sleep and stayed up till 7am this morning and only got a couple hours rest. It was torture for sure but I just forced myself to get up and go because I had a good feeling about this group, and you just never know what will happen. It turned out to be a nice time, and I think there is some promise for the future here. I do wish I could of been more social than I was. I did ok, but the lack of sleep combined with anxiety sorta pushed my limit and probably made me come off as more "stand-offish" than I really am. This is a serious issue for me.

It was good that it was a topic that I had genuine interest in, and no, it wasn't a sausage fest - the male/female split was even, and all of the latter were cute. One in particular caught my attention as the kind of girl I'd love to date, though a problem with the group dynamic is that it is hard to get to know somebody on an intimate, one to one level. This is something that pickypicky has pointed out as a big stumbling block to meeting somebody this way. Nonetheless, you have to start somewhere. My hope is that I can go to this meetup group (and possibly others) consistently enough that the initial anxiety will wane and I can focus on making something out of the opportunity social wise.

Going to that first meeting though, is always a bitch. That's why you want to try and find groups that meet consistently, so that initial expenditure of energy doesn't go to waste.

where the hell do you even find these kinds of groups? i don't even know where to begin

It's been three months since I started this thread. No more excuses: the trail running group is meeting today and I'm going to go. I won't know anyone there.

Right now it looks like it'll be four women and three men.

Good luck, andrew. Always good to see some of us making progress, no matter how little it might be.

@Mr. C, I know what you're talking about with the anxiety thing. Sometimes when I do things I can't sleep for the entire night because it's like you're excited and anxious at the same time.

http://www.meetup.com/

Screw meetup groups. I don't want to meet anyone....people suck. Everyone is an asshole.

I just want to stay inside, watch movies, and read books.....oh, but I still want a girlfriend

My sentiments exactly.

Unfortunately, most girls don't want a guy who is like that. Sad reality.

I think women are automatically creeped out by loners, no matter what they look like or how much money they have. They know that a man with no one else in his life will be clingy.

Exactly the same as me. I don't want to jump through all the hoops, and go through all that crap, and meet a bunch of a-holes. I wanna sit at home. But a girl would still be nice

Good luck with it, and I hope it turns out well.

This. In a nutshell.

Lately I've only been on this board during the weekends because of work and stuff. I refuse to log into this at work.

Anyhoo the trail run meetup was no big deal. All the women flaked out, except for the organizer. Who was a _little_ bit neurotic, but who am I to judge? It was her, me, and two other men.

And we went running on trails around here and that was that. We had our small talk. She asked me about the other groups I'm on and I mentioned my introvert one. Which she recalled noticing when going over the member bios. That was a tiny bit uncomfortable for me but whatever.

At the end two of us noticed that she seemed in a bit of a hurry to get out of there. Eh, won't take it personally.

Next time this comes up and I'm free I'm going to do it. It should be easier the second time around.

Guys, you _have_ to get out there. Even if it's for stupid stuff like this. Nothing is going to get better as long as you're stuck home.