Sure, but none of this necessarily has anything to do with neediness, lol. Neediness and what you're referring to here are two seperate issues. At most you could make the argument that this could be an example of something a needy person might do. Sure, I'll give you that, but this is also something a non needy sociopath could do. It's something a con artist could do. It's not necessarily neediness, if someone does this.

Now you're basically getting into a whole other topic of discussion, when this thread was supposed to be about "squashing neediness". The way to squash neediness is to make yourself no longer needy. In other words, give yourself plenty of options, so that you're not reliant on the one rare woman who accepts you. If you crave sex and affection, and you only get it once in a blue moon, THIS is what's going to make you needy. Just like a starving person is needy for food, because they only rarely have access to it. If you can only find a woman who is attracted to you once in a very rare while, you're going to be needy with her, because you're afraid of how long the next dry spell is going to be. The best way to squash this is to make yourself attractive to more women, if possible. You could also try to overcome the constant desire for affection, or take up a vice, or maybe get a pet to cope with it, or something along these lines.

Doing something for emotional validation (needy person) or gains of money/power (sociopath/con-artist) are two sides of the same coin. The main difference is that the former is a more frequent problem and the person who does it usually has no knowledge that they are acting disingenuously. The latter cases are more likely to have the facade hold up for longer. But in all cases, the facade usually falls down like a house of cards eventually.

And yes, I agree that making yourself as attractive as possible is a great way to squash neediness. Improving yourself should be a main priority in life. But you should do it for yourself, of course.

The OP makes some good points. But here is my take on it. Spending your life moping over something you cannot have is both wasteful and self destructive. Since I have begun to tread the path of ceasing to give a flying fuck, I sleep better, feel better, and actually want to wake up in the mornings. If you want to take the getting jacked route then good for you. If you want to wake up and realise that women are deranged, lying, spiteful entitled bitches who can be bought, then that's cool also. But don't spend your life beating yourself up like I did. I was stupid and my own worst enemy. But the good news is that I woke up.

I don't think that all women are deranged, lying, spiteful entitled bitches, but you should certainly avoid the ones that are and NOT get hung up on your inability to attract them. But if you have the idea that they all are, those are the types that you are going to generally attract, take it from me.

Clearly, your inner desire is for a society that functions smoothly, therefore you don't indulge in fist fights, arguments, theft, and adultery. Therefore you are not suppressing those things, as they are not your true inner desires.



see above

But I agree that this thread is muddled between it's stated intention and the subsequent discussion.

If you want to actually squash neediness, follow Ethnocide's advice regarding that.

If you want to express it as your honest feeling, you can do that. It's a very classically romantic move to be utterly swept up by another person, letting them know that they are all you think of, that they alone are in your thoughts always. I think that's a tough play to make work in this day and age though, just IMO.

Optimist.