Good news is I ran into that girl again (the girl who told me I was a model.) It was cursing me because I said...Oh what a fool I was for not flirting with her or getting her number. Well obviously meta-spirits are real, because 2 days after the curse was getting so bad I had to post on forums about it, she shows up at a restaurant. Unbelievable. It is obvious at this point that some kind of supernatural occurence is happening in this world. I was an atheist because I wanted God to die. But somehow, God will not die.
Anyway, I flirted her up, asked if she still thought I was cute. she was mubling and dancing around darting back and forth like a retard, couldn't talk to me straight. half way through a sentence she would look away and giggle and then sway around like a retard. Couldn't understand half the shit she was saying. It was fucking embarassing humiliating and retarded. i asked for her facebook but she told me she didn't have one...she didn't seem too interested in giving me an alternative. I asked her if she thought i was cute and she didn't answer the question and just walked out the door. Fucking humiliating. Well the first curse is gone, back to the old curse. The old curse of being alone and not being chased by anyone.
But as a male, im just expected to maintain my composure. Like I dont have any feelings. like I can get shat on by this garbage world and just Im supposed to not be phased. Thats what they teach you in Alpha male pickup tactics. What a load of shit. Im really sick of this world and that alpha male bullshit. They say alpha males need to be joyful. Well i dont want to be an alpha male, and im not going to fake a joy I dont have. They can go fuck themselves, eat shit and die, I never asked to be male, never asked to be in a male body, and this is the Shit i have to deal with, these fucking self-absorbed cunts who dont give 1 shit about my feelings... Cant be depressed around a girl becuse shee wont like me, cant show her how i feel, my feelings dont matter, all that matters is what the girl feels. Fuck em. Fuck em all. Im so done with this world and the shit fucking shitters in this world. I wish them the worst.
You know, you have to be 100% for a woman because they are so self-absorbed and entitled. you have to shave every day. Every fuckin day. You know, I wasnt in as good a mood, I was scruffy looking. Apparently, not good enough for her. She said i looked like a model last year. But when she catches me on one of my normal days, where im not prettied up, im not good enough for her. I have to look perfect and have a perfect attitude. What a fucking joke. meanwhile, these bitches complain about men objectifying them and making them wear makeup. What a fucking Lie. Girls dont have to wear makeup to attract a man, but if youre a man you have to be 100% perfect for a girl to like you. Im exposing the bullshit for what it is, girls are self-absorbed hypocrits and narcissists and full of shit. Like 100% full of shit.
What I'm trying to say is, the feeling of hope is the worst torment you can do to someone. Regret nothing because 9/10 it's rigged against you and you had a low chance of winning anyway. If you strike out with a girl, it's because it's a broken game, the game is rigged, the odds were against you to begin with, nothing to punish yourself over.