Ivory tower
From Love-shy.com wiki: A wiki for the dating-challenged
The term "ivory tower" is a pejorative used to deride elite academic or bureaucratic institutions. It derives from the ivory towers that have historically been a part of university architecture. Often, someone who is perceived as being overly buried in theory and isolated from reality is accused of taking refuge in an ivory tower.
Love-shys, especially Gilmartian love-shys, are occasionally accused of escaping to an ivory tower when their theories are challenged, most notably by looksists. Looksists, who are usually the most vocal critics of love-shyness as a concept, often accuse love-shys of manufacturing a fantasy reality where their personality, not their looks, is the reason for their incel. An alternate charge directed toward the more physically attractive love-shys who receive indicators of interest but do not respond properly is that they are "weak" and need to "man up".
Love-shys who are struggling with their issues view such accusations as bare-faced insults and a prima facie example of shaming tactics. They also see such accusations as startlingly similar to the general societal dismissal of love-shy difficulties. Some also question whether the accusers are also jealous of the indicators of interest that some love-shys receive.
Elitist love-shy attitudes
The general criticism of love-shys' elitist tendencies is not without merit, as some love-shys have been lacking of understanding regarding incels who have no approach anxiety but are consistently rejected. Some vocal love-shys detest the incel and, in particular, looksist faction of the forum, as they see them as foreigners vocally colonizing love-shy soil. This is an ongoing issue in the love-shy/incel controversy.
